Benny the Psychiatrist
One day, Benny the psychiatrist was coming home from work on the underground when he saw an elderly gentleman talking to himself and then laughing aloud. Every so often, the man would put up his hand, stop talking then start all over again. Benny had to find out more.
“Excuse me, I hope you don’t mind me asking, but is there anything I can do to help?”
“Thank you but no. To keep me awake, I tell myself jokes when I’m traveling.”
“But why do you keep raising your hand?” asked Benny.
“Oh, that’s to stop me telling a joke I’ve heard before.”

The Salesman
Rachel and Sarah meet one day in Fashion Square Mall.
“Is it true, Rachel,” asks Sarah, “that your son Harold has moved out of law?”
“Yes, it’s true,” replies Rachel, “he’s now a salesman in a tailor shop.”
“Mazeltov” (Congratulations), says Sarah, “but a salesman? Is he any good at it?”
Rachel replies, “Is he any good? Why he’s brilliant. Only yesterday a woman comes into his shop to buy a suit to bury her poor late husband in. And guess what my Harold did? He talked her into buying an extra pair of trousers.”

The Present
Sheldon was passing by a florist when he saw a sign in the window saying, "Say It With Flowers."
He went into the shop and said to the assistant, "Wrap up one rose for me."
"Only one?" the assistant asked.
"Just one," replied Sheldon. "I'm a man of few words."

The Streaker
Two elderly ladies, Hannah and Miriam, were walking home one afternoon in Scottsdale. Suddenly, a very old male ‘streaker’ ran past them.
Hannah says, "What was that, Miriam?"
Miriam replies, "I don't know, Hannah, but whatever it was it needs ironing."